If you find out that your woman has cheated on you, you will be faced with two equally tough choices. Will you need to stay or walk away from your relationship? There is no one clear-cut answer that will suit every person, for you need to take a number of factors into serious consideration. Here are some of the things that you should bear in mind if you want to make up your mind on what to do.
Is this a repeat offence?
Perhaps your woman had cheated earlier and you had already made up before she went back to cheating once more. In such a case, there are basically three different choices open to you. You can decide to dig deeper than before to determine what she gets outside your relationship that you seem to fail to give her. You may also resolve to turn a blind eye on her cheating and continue with your relationship as if the other man does not exist. Alternatively, you may decide that enough is enough and move on with your own life without her.
Her cheating happened once
It could be that your woman was carried over and cheated once. She may have stopped after the first act because of different reasons. For example, the guilt she felt may have been so overwhelming that she decided to avoid such a situation again. Or she may have come to her senses after that first mess and realized that she loved you too much to cheat on you. There are very high chances of forming an even stronger relationship, and you should really give her a chance to make up for her mistake.
It may be her first affair but it has not stopped
If your wife keeps seeing that other man then you will have even tougher choices. If you decide that you do not want to lose her then you will need to take decisive action fast. You do not expect to heal your relationship when there is still someone between you.
This is one place where it is in order to use an ultimatum. You will need to have a stand and let her choose between you and her new lover and then stick to your decision unwaveringly. Let her decide once and for all.
She seems to waver between you and her lover
The situation where she finds it difficult to choose between you and her lover is not common. However, it is even more delicate and needs a lot of care. This will show that she is being honest, and you will need to be honest in turn. You can either decide to stand by her, in which case you will need to have a very persuasive tongue. If you want to succeed, you will need to know what she gets from her affair and find appropriate ways of fulfilling her need. You then need to make the right approach. On the other hand, you may decide the case for her and send her off.
2012年10月2日星期二
2012年9月26日星期三
Spouse Cheating Should it Mark the End for Your Marriage?
Although there is no doubt that cheating goes to the depths of betrayal, it does not necessarily have to mark the end for your marriage. There are many couples who find it difficult to get over the cheating of their partners. This may be due to the reasons behind the betrayal, or just the fact that the betrayal happened. However, you do not have to let cheating mark an end for your marriage.
When you discover that your spouse has cheated on you, you can use this as the starting point towards a stronger relationship. You will need to review your marriage and determine the things that you need to change to develop a stronger relationship.
If you do not want cheating to mark the end for your marriage, you must be prepared to work very hard at saving your relationship. This is important irrespective of who cheated the other in your marriage. Both of you will need to make necessary adjustments to prevent the possibility of cheating later on.
The following things will help you to determine whether you would like to restore your relationship or call it quits.
What prompted the cheating?
For cheating to take place, the other person must have been providing something that was lacking in the relationship. Could it be that the partner who cheated wanted more appreciation or admiration?
Once you have determined what led to the cheating, you should consider whether it will be fulfilled within your marriage henceforth. Have there been any changes to correct the problem? Do you believe that the changes will be long-lasting or are they simply temporary measures? What part are you personally going to play to ensure that there is an appropriate change?
Are both of you prepared to work at preventing a vicious cycle?
Both of you need to be really committed to saving your relationship if you do not want cheating to be the end for your marriage. However, even if your spouse does not seem to be committed, you should not throw in the towel. You will still be able to save your marriage if you are really committed. It is just that you must be prepared to work even harder to achieve this. You will take most of the responsibility in healing the hurt between you.
When you do not give up, you will finally manage to save your marriage and get into an even stronger relationship than before, leaving no room for any more cheating in the future.
When you discover that your spouse has cheated on you, you can use this as the starting point towards a stronger relationship. You will need to review your marriage and determine the things that you need to change to develop a stronger relationship.
If you do not want cheating to mark the end for your marriage, you must be prepared to work very hard at saving your relationship. This is important irrespective of who cheated the other in your marriage. Both of you will need to make necessary adjustments to prevent the possibility of cheating later on.
The following things will help you to determine whether you would like to restore your relationship or call it quits.
What prompted the cheating?
For cheating to take place, the other person must have been providing something that was lacking in the relationship. Could it be that the partner who cheated wanted more appreciation or admiration?
Once you have determined what led to the cheating, you should consider whether it will be fulfilled within your marriage henceforth. Have there been any changes to correct the problem? Do you believe that the changes will be long-lasting or are they simply temporary measures? What part are you personally going to play to ensure that there is an appropriate change?
Are both of you prepared to work at preventing a vicious cycle?
Both of you need to be really committed to saving your relationship if you do not want cheating to be the end for your marriage. However, even if your spouse does not seem to be committed, you should not throw in the towel. You will still be able to save your marriage if you are really committed. It is just that you must be prepared to work even harder to achieve this. You will take most of the responsibility in healing the hurt between you.
When you do not give up, you will finally manage to save your marriage and get into an even stronger relationship than before, leaving no room for any more cheating in the future.
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